You say "um" because your mouth is ahead of your next thought and silence feels dangerous. The fix is not to force the word out; it is to get comfortable with a short pause, so your brain has a moment to catch up without your voice filling the gap.
What counts as a filler word
Filler words are the sounds and phrases that carry no meaning but hold your place in the conversation. The classics are um and uh. Close behind are like, so, right, okay, actually, basically, you know and kind of. Many people also have a signature phrase they lean on at the start of every answer: "So, yeah…" or "I mean…".
A few are fine. Everyday conversation is full of them and nobody notices. They become a problem when they arrive every few words, because the audience starts hearing the fillers instead of you, and because they make you sound less sure of what you are saying than you are.
Why they happen
- Silence feels risky. In conversation, a pause can be an invitation for someone else to jump in. So we learn to make a noise to keep the floor. In a presentation nobody is going to interrupt you, but the habit comes with you.
- You are thinking while you talk. When you are not sure what comes next, the filler is your brain buying time.
- You are speaking too fast. Speed and filler words travel together. The faster you go, the sooner you outrun your thoughts.
- Nerves. Adrenaline speeds everything up, which makes all of the above worse.
Step 1: find out which ones you use
Most people have no idea how often they say "um" until they hear it. Record yourself for two minutes answering a simple question, like "what did you do last weekend?" or "explain your job to a stranger". Then listen back and tally every filler.
You are looking for patterns. Do they cluster at the start of sentences? When you move between points? When you are asked a question? Knowing where they appear tells you where to put the pause instead.
Step 2: replace the filler with a pause
Do not try to simply stop saying it. Trying not to say a word tends to make you think about it more. Give yourself something to do instead: close your mouth and pause.
Earl's advice to people who speak too quickly applies here too: in between your phrases, count two beats. That small gap gives your next thought time to arrive. And a pause of a second or two, which feels endless to you, sounds deliberate and calm to everyone listening.
Step 3: slow down
If you speak more slowly, you need fewer fillers, because your thoughts keep up with your mouth. A few things that help:
- Stand up when you speak. It is one of Earl's tips for slowing your delivery: it raises your energy, which sounds odd as a way to slow down, but it gives your voice support and makes rushing less likely.
- Use your hands, his other tip. Gestures give you a natural rhythm and fill the space that a filler would otherwise take.
- Breathe at the end of each idea, not in the middle of a sentence. Diaphragm breathing, covered in our breathing exercises, gives you enough air to finish a thought.
There is more on this in our guide to speaking clearly and slowing down.
Step 4: know your transitions
Fillers love the gaps between points. If you know exactly how you get from one section to the next, there is no gap to fill. When you rehearse, plan and say aloud the one sentence that links each part: "That's the problem. Here's what we did about it."
The same goes for the very start. Many people say "So, um…" before their first real word. Memorize your opening line so you can begin cleanly.
Step 5: practise in real conversation
A presentation is easier to control than a conversation, so once the pause feels natural in rehearsal, take it into meetings, phone calls and video calls. Pick one filler to focus on per week. Ask a colleague you trust to tell you when they hear it.
A two-week practice plan
| Days | What to do |
|---|---|
| 1 | Record two minutes of yourself speaking off the cuff. Count your fillers. Note where they appear. |
| 2–5 | Read aloud for five minutes a day, pausing for two beats at every full stop. |
| 6–7 | Record a new two-minute answer. Compare the count with day 1. |
| 8–11 | Pick your most common filler. Pause instead of it in every meeting and call. |
| 12–14 | Rehearse a short presentation with planned transitions. Record it and count once more. |
Do not chase zero. A handful of fillers in a long talk is normal. The aim is that nobody notices them.
If you would like someone to listen and catch them for you, this is exactly the kind of thing that moves quickly in one-to-one coaching or as part of presentation skills training.